Depression

[hyde66]

I am totallyl upset by my son's recent diagnosis of bipolar He mainly has the depression side of it. He is on antidepressants, antianxiety pills, and a mood stabilizer. I have a hard time going to work when he is feeling depressed. I know he loves it when I'm home and it seems to make him feel better. I don't know what to do.. Any suggestions? I'm miserable at work. I worry about him constantly..

[UroDoc]

Sorry to hear about your hardship. The medications should help. I would suggest seeing a therapist yourself and perhaps joining a local support group. Good luck.

[Catherine]

I can't even imagine how difficult it must be to work when you have such serious concerns about your son. I wish you the best of luck and will keep your family in my prayers.

[shari]

I am the mom of a teenager. I have clinical depression, and so did my grandmother, aunt, and father. When I was a teenager, I would stay home from school for days at a time because I really couldn't face the day. Some forty years later, still having depression issues, I try to help moms who think their child might be depressed. My son, albeit he would never admit it, has a disorder consistant with
depression and or ADD. Problem is, he won't even consider the possibility. So the unfinished homework, bad tests, etc, he writes off to no reason at all.... Your son would do well in a
group. The one thing I felt so isolated by was that all my friends were normal.
They didn't have these thoughts. But I would have been helped by learning of
these effects on my life thru other teens facing the same demons. You cannot
help him from himself. He probably disguises his emotions and tells you that all is well.
Denial is a bigger disporder than any known. Find a group, and see if that
let's you deal day to day with this... Don't ever let him go to the 'no hope'
mind set. Hopeless kills more people than anything else.

[frozenlady]

I've had bipolar probably all of my life, but didn't know it until I was about 36 years old. I am now 52 years old. 40% of the problem is genetic and 60% environmental and cultural. We live in a fast paced world of ipods, constant television, noises from construction or automobiles on the freeway. People spend too much time indoors watching t.v. or playing computer games or searching the internet. This is bad for us but especially for children for our ancestors were hunter/gatherers and/or herdsman and spent a great deal of time searching for food to eat while wandering the plains. Children now want instant gratification and do not have a great deal of patience. When I was young, we had to wait just to watch Mickey Mouse on T.V. A bulls eye would come on for an hour it seemed, before the cartoons came on. Mothers didn't have to work and we didn't have microwaves, so everyone had to show up for dinner at the same time to avoid their food being cold. Rewarming took an hour in the oven.

Since Bush and Clinton put into effect that world trade agreement, families can no longer live on one income, unless you're a doctor or something. Sometimes we get confused with what "we want" with what "we need". If we went back to our tribal ancestorial ways, and lived off the land we wouldn't have all of modern day society's ills and pains. People were so tired after searching for food all day, they didn't have time to be depressed.

I am convinced that I was spared the heartache of bipolar symptoms as a child and young adult, because I played outdoors and had daily exercise in P.E. in school. I didn't have the computers, television and ipods to occupy my time. In my day, parents thought that t.v. had radiation in it that could be harmful to your eyes, and so we were limited to watching it one hour per week on Sunday, and it was Walt Disney. Smaller portioned meals and healthy food even at school.

If you are married, take the time off and be with your son. I know this is not possible when you are a single mom. It's not important what we have, it's WHO WE HAVE. We don't need things like fancy cars and big houses, so one income is fine if you have a supporting spouse.

The doctors will want to medicate your son and keep him sedated. There is nothing better than eating right and exercise to counteract our techno culture. The medicine is needed yes, but controlling the environment is 60% of the problem.

[shari]

I read your post of your situation . I am so sorry you are burdened with such fear. Having some
experience in this area, I want to tell you to find things you can do with your son. Just
having contact, and interest in each other helps a lot. When I was 16 I was so depressed, and
tried and failed to end the madness. God wasn't ready for me yet, and I survived.. even better,
no one ever knew.... except the Algebra teacher who didn't understand why I did not
study the night before.........stay close to your child... as much as they push us away... we need
to stay close..... it is what God wants us to do.. we are here to protect our children, and often
it is from themselves. There are genetic links to these issues, as well. I will keep you in
my prayers.

[tulch001]

Dear Concerned Mom,

I understand where you're coming from. I am writing to comfort you more from your son's standpoint, as I am now on mood stabilizers for Bipolar Type II.

It takes time for the medications to kick in - up to six weeks. Also, depending on how long you've been on said medications, your son might not have quite the right dosage yet - it takes a bit of finagling, or at least it did for me.

With time your son will get better and not want you home as much. I'd agree with previous recommendations and join a support group. I'd encourage your son to reach out to other bipolar people his age to talk to as well. It really helps.

Sincerely,
Daughter of another concerned mom.